This is another post I will announce prior to…
No “Judgy Judy’s” Allowed
I asked the male flight attendant that called to tell me that they found my lost box of stuff I bought in Orlando, what the box looks like considering that a set of Japanese sushi dishes were inside since Monday morning.
He said he didn’t hear anything rattling around.
Then I jokingly told him how excited I was to get my “*ground up kitten fetus face lotion” in bottles all written in Japanese and for all I know it could be hemorrhoid cream or foot fungus ointment…BUT I’M GONNA TRY IT!
He was laughing so hard and then got all serious and said, “You have my cell number. You better call me if the ground up kitten lotion works. I will get myself some.”
Bahhhaaaa!
No kittens were harmed but I don’t really know because I don’t read Japanese.
No sushi dishes harmed either it turns out. Amazing, right? Look at that box!
Crazy Sarah, why I call her “crazy” story [here] and another goodie [here,] told me she thinks its foreskin from circumcised babies because the Japanese never waste anything. Personally, I doubt it since it was only $20 and looks far to sterile and like Lubriderm to be human skin. Right? Did is waste my three sons foreskin? OMG, that doctor looked no older than twenty-five years old!
Duped again.
*I’m joking. I am nearly certain no kittens were harmed.
Abbie Gale at allthatmakesyou.com
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PS If you are a publisher or producer email me and I will give you my phone number. If you are Child Protective Services email me and I will give you the phone number of someone I don’t like. If you want to come and help me fold clothes and put them away I will give you my address and a big kiss.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Funny stuff Abbie Hoffman! I likey. I think I’ll follow along. Found you thru discussion on Bloppy’s about Blog Conference experience. Sounds very scary.
It wasn’t bad. I just decided to go four days before and made the mistake of not having made enough connections with people. It’s cool though. I have my video I made alone, dancing in my room, with a toy robot, to “Call Me Maybe” and sober. That, my friend, is a YouTube classic.
Heh. Foreskin from circumcised babies actually does get put to use, right here in the good ol’ USA! I shit you not, my friend got a skin graft on her leg last year. That skin graft was created in a lab, with baby foreskin as the…seed?…from which it was grown!
Awesome, so does that mean I grew a baby and part of some woman’s leg? I definitely have super powers then.
Sure. Or someone’s nose, ear, arm…just the skin, of course.