blogging

Listen To Your Mother!

March 1, 2013

I have been invited to audition for “Listen To Your Mother” and I am so ridiculously excited! I sat in on some of the readings, in NYC last year, and I was blown away by these folks! So very flattered to have even be considered and I don’t think I have ever “auditioned” for anything [...]

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Silent Sunday and Crabby Caption

October 21, 2012

These three pictures tell a story. I will let you tell it. What do you think was going on? Still tweaking my blog. Please leave a comment or suggestion on things that need improvement or you wish I was doing or perhaps I should stop doing. I know my topics are a little all over. [...]

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I Was Interviewed by CNN and not for Mischief, Kind of Anyway

September 20, 2012

I am quoted by Shanon Cook from CNN today! Check it out by clicking the photo. Does Botox Affect The Ability To Parent?  By Shanon Cook, CNN Below is the funny story that led to Shanon Cook contacting me.  I have been so excited to share it with you.  I wasn’t saying a word until I read the [...]

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Blogger Idol

September 17, 2012

I can’t believe I am doing this. I am still trying to find my “like” button on my new self hosted site and I somehow think I am now qualified to audition for… Blogger Idol I am afraid my “like” button is gone forever but if you have ever “liked” my stories before please head [...]

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Birth of a Blog

September 2, 2012

By talking to myself I am ensuring my external hard drive keeps the memories that my mind sometimes cannot remember. When I looked back at my photographs I knew I needed to tell the story. My blog was born.

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Awkward! What do I do Now?

August 12, 2012

This does not change the fact that I just got a naked topless picture of a mom I know from my boys school.

A pair of boobies staring at me that I find myself studying and concluding that those are indeed her boobies.

Holy-Mother-of-God. What do I do?

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Poor Tired Husbands and their Wives’ Naughty Books

August 3, 2012

I feel like an outcast.

My sweet, southern, girlfriends that I find so refreshing, have a little secret.

You can drive by their brick houses and see that something is going on with the family that lives there. The pansies that were planted last fall are leggy in their flower beds and should have been pulled out a month ago, and replaced with begonias. Their flower pots are sitting empty. Has there been a separation? Impending divorce? Illness?

No, they just discovered “mommy porn.” They are hiding in a little corner in their homes reading “Fifty Shades of Grey.” I know because when we go to soccer practices or the club their whispering about it, giggling. They greet each other with, “what page are you on?” They declare that the second book is better than the first. Everyone my age is talking about it as if they have never seen the opposite sex’s private parts in the daylight. They are acting like a locker room full of high school boys with a dirty magazine. I feel so left out!

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Ellie Mae Takes on NYC

July 30, 2012

I HAVE NEVER BEEN TO NYC???!!!

With that said, if you see me wandering around NYC aimlessly, do me a favor and yell, “MOM!!!!!! We’re hungry! He broke my Lego Star Wars ship! I can’t poop! I can’t stop pooping! Come and see my cool corn poop!” That way I don’t get homesick.

Also if you see me, please introduce yourself in case I don’t recognize you because you look SO MUCH better in person!

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When Did I Lose Faith in Myself?

July 26, 2012

We would be instant chums. She would tell me she appreciates my brass ba!!s when it comes to what I want to post and yet understands why I spell inappropriate words with symbols. She would give me the inside scoop on how things really work and tell me plainly what I am doing wrong and how I can improve. She would share my fondness of vodka and love of desserts. She would tell me there is a place for me and that I am not like everyone else that calls herself a blogger. She would offer me a cigar.

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What is a Wordless Wednesday?

July 11, 2012

I took this photo yesterday at my father in-laws house. Ok, so I get the wordless Wednesday thing but I have been without any consistent technology and I’m breaking! So until I finish writing, (ON MY PHONE) a post for tomorrow I will leave you with a photo I took yesterday, and a few words. [...]

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