Listen To Your Mother!

I have been invited to audition for “Listen To Your Mother” and I am so ridiculously excited!

Listen To Your Mother

I sat in on some of the readings, in NYC last year, and I was blown away by these folks!

So very flattered to have even be considered and I don’t think I have ever “auditioned” for anything in my life?

OMG! What have I done?!

I also over think, so of course I sent a “few” essays because in my head I would be doing them a “favor” by having a funny story, an opinionated story, a sad story… to fill in their need to cover a range of emotions.

What was I thinking because you know they would pick what I am 99% of the time not…serious.

I will be driving to Raleigh and going to read a story that I am hoping won’t make me cry and hoping people don’t think I am “Serious Sue” because I wouldn’t want anyone to think I wasn’t the class clown, right?

I am sure I won’t get picked because frankly, I know many “real” writers that have been turned down numerous times and they are really, really good, (and the snots know how to use a comma.)

I am bringing Chapstick and I am going to write on their car windows…

Chapstick on the car window

“I didn’t want to be part of your silly show anyway!” on my way out.

(Ok, so I was having a little fun with the comma.)

But I really, really do want to be part of it because it is cool and it raises money for charity and it brings people together around Mother’s Day.   Sharing with each other what being a mother means is beautiful.

Listen To Your Mother Auditioners

Now, I would have used up all of the Chapstick and then I’d have to break out my favorite “emergency” red lipstick I keep in the car, and tell them I don’t mean it.

“Listen To Your Mother” is the funny, the serious and all the mixed up mommy roles in the middle.

It is a cool production and if you don’t believe me check out the website and go see a show in your city with your mom, sister or girlfriends.

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Listen to Your Mother Cities Video

“Listen To Your Mother” is like having your mom battery recharged.

It reminds you that mostly, we are built on the foundation of your relationship with that “Mother” in your life, from good to bad and from gratefulness for having the perfect mother to lessons learned from your mother’s mistakes. No one is perfect and many of these folks can make any situation funny and endearing.

Can you tell I am a little excited?

Wish me luck or at least that I don’t do that thing where I fall while standing still, (and my feet go up in the air and I show my underwear or that other thing I do when I walk and my feet go up in the air and I lay myself out.)

It runs in the family.

Funny Photo Bloopers

Here is my little niece doing my move when I went to take her picture.  She did it sitting!  Talent.  No one has been able to get a picture of me doing the “move” since I always have the camera on me.

OMG.  

They video tape “Listen To Your Mother” don’t they?

COMING SOON!  VIDEO OF ABBIE DOING HER AWESOME “ON PURPOSE FALL” TO MAKE THE WORLD HAPPY BY LAUGHING, (I know I don’t do it on purpose but just go with it.)

Abbie Gale at allthatmakesyou.com

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Email me at: allthatmakesyousmile@gmail.com
PS If you are a publisher or producer email me and I will give you my phone number. If you are Child Protective Services email me and I will give you the phone number of someone I don’t like. If you want to come and help me fold clothes and put them away I will give you my address and a big kiss.

 

 

And a Cocktail for Everyone!

Just getting the party pictures downloaded from last night. I met our guests at the door with a cocktail made with wedding cake vodka and pineapple juice and a blackberry in the bottom. I figured if the party stinks it won’t matter if I get them a little tipsy…they won’t remember!
I have been moping around all day. Not hung over but in need of an epidural from the pain in my legs and hips from running up and down stairs with knee boot high heels.
I sincerely thought I would be needing a banana bag today. I am so impressed with how grown up I am now that I am 40. Then I saw the photo booth pictures and decided I haven’t grown up.
Some of those picture to come!

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Abbie
Allthatmakesyou.com

Trusting Santa Clause

Another awkward family Christmas photo. What does it say about your kid if he doesn’t trust Santa? Peter is keeping his eyes on him. He looks as if he’s thinking this Clause character isn’t to be trusted. Is everyone sitting around on their couches snacking on Christmas cookies and enjoying this relaxing time of year? Of course not! It has been super busy here and I am sure you are super busy there.

Our white Christmas

Our North Carolina white Christmas from a couple years ago.

We have the usual Holiday madness but I decided to create extra mad arsed insanity this year with inviting 100 people over for our charity birthday party on 12.21.12 I had to skip a few things and cut myself some slack. I didn’t put out Santa and his reindeer. Santa and Reindeer I have to run one cord to light each of them and I can’t have 100 people tripping and frankly I don’t want to deal with all of the putting up and taking down madness this year. Christmas Cookies! I haven’t even baked one batch of cookies! I will, the day after the party. Because we do a little Christmas Eve tradition. I make the cookies and box them up for all the neighbors. Jim strings lights on the golf cart and we play Christmas music . We let the boys wear their pajamas and robes. They “sneak attack” sweet treats on our friends front porches. For the first time ever…NO CHRISTMAS CARDS with stories!

Christmas Card

I am not kidding when I tell you I think I have sent my own Christmas cards since I was probably ten. How did I not turn into Martha Stewart, (minus the prison thing?) I am sending New Years Cards and I am not even starting them until December 22.

I am cutting myself some slack. After the tragedy at Sandy Hook I just can’t help but think that more time spent with the kids and helping others that are less fortunate than us is the most important things this year.

Is anyone else in less of a decorating mood this holiday season?

Keep your eyes on Santa

Keep your eyes on Santa, Peter is sure he isn’t to be trusted.

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I did drag the 100 pound snowman that was love at first site down.

When I say “I” dragged that means I called my 24 year-old nephew.

Poor nephew has to hear me say the entire time, “Please be mindful of his cute carrot nose.”

He tolerates because I feed him.

Jim is not allowed to have any more shoulder surgeries so I can continue to buy more obnoxious and heavy Christmas decorations.

Follow me by subscribing. I hate talking to myself. allthatmakesyou.com Facebook subscribe: Abbie Allthatmakesyou Like and subscribe to my Facebook page: All That Makes You Twitter @allthatmakesyou Email me at: allthatmakesyousmile@gmail.com PS If you are a publisher or producer email me and I will give you my phone number. If you are Child Protective Services email me and I will give you the phone number of someone I don’t like. If you want to come and help me fold clothes and put them away I will give you my address and a big kiss.

Unlovable but Likable

You can use the state of my closet as an indicator to know my current mental status.

My closet told me today I was bat-$hit crazy.

I have decided if I clean out my closet I will be able to carry on with my Christmas decorating and baking.

If, when I am finished, I do not feel dramatically better I will move onto holiday “spirits.”

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Y’all might be getting rum cakes delivered this year instead of “Abbie’s Worth-Buying-New-Pants Cookie Assortment.”

If eating all of the sweets I make doesn’t work I may need someone to come over and give me an official “nuts” diagnosis, (surely the treatment is a housekeeper and laundress.)

In the meantime, I haven’t been posting because, honestly, I’m not feeling very worthy of anyone reading.

The good news is I am hopeful once I can see all my shoes again and I don’t have to drive around barefoot anymore I am certain my funky mood will change.

I have to laugh at what my sister in Michigan said to me today after I told her I felt “unlovable” and “destined to be alone and “without even the love of my children.”. I know, that is really pathetic sounding, but I am very self aware and I am suffering from a variety of “mental boo-boo lip” so be patient with me and be even more patient with my punctuation and run on sentences.

“We’ll you might be unlovable but you’re the most likable person I know and I know a lot of people I wish I liked more.” -My Wise Sister

Can you tell we were raised by the same people?

Then I thought I would just shut down my blog. Then I thought…I will wait.

I will see what unfolds.

I feel like my blog has helped me “unfold” in some ways. Some good ways and some bad.

Some selfish and some very sincere time I have spent throwing our lives out into the world.

Some days,like today, I feel like if I evaporated all that would be left would be my words.

All that my kids would know is what I put here.

Isn’t that why I started this thing?
I realized I was in a funk because I realized I had outlived my mother.

I started my blog. Most people I know don’t know me beyond my adult life. That’s is why I named my blog, “All that makes you smile, laugh, think, love and cry.” I knew I was all of those things, just like everyone else. I wanted my kids to see I was all of those things.

My kids wouldn’t know who I was if something happened to me. They wouldn’t really know how much I loved them.

Then I met really nice people.

So, my really nice friends, I feel like I owe an explanation as to my sporadic postings the last little while, or longer.

I am working on some things and trying not to worry.

Nothing gets accomplished worrying.

I share this with the same intentions I had when starting my blog. Not everyone agrees with posting things this personal, I wouldn’t have thought it wise a year ago.

Now I can say that this is me.
It is nearly everyone. I am not alone and neither is the person reading this thinking that they are tired of everyone else being happy and they aren’t.

So my dear boys, if you ever do decide to read this please know I am human.

Parents of teenagers are not given classes how to speak your language. Parents can love each other very much but not be able to be on the same page with parenting. I wish I could remember how to do algebra and at one time I would have never considered myself stupid. I am not even close to being the parent I thought I would be. When you are a parent one day and you feel the same way please know its ok.

I am holding out that all that matters is that my boys know how much I love them and that is really all that is important.

Worrying I am worthy of being loved sometimes smothers out the importance of knowing I am liked.

I have to get back to wrestling my closet. It’s in a total mood.

Sincerely, Abbie