I could make a tiered red velvet cake at his age, alone. I remember my mom handing me the keys to her Mazda when I was eleven and her saying, “Go get some bread and milk.” And I did. Doesn’t mean that it was right, but I could do it. He genuinely could not get his shoes laced up. He was mad and he was mad at me for not doing it for him.
Back then you didn’t go and buy boobies like today. You either had them or you didn’t. You either had them because you were on the heavier side and since boobies are, well, fat or you sold your soul to the devil because your a size 2 jeans with a size D cup. These were some mean skinny girls with some giant knockers.
This is a story about how happy I was to not be the person, for once, that the horribly embarrassing moment happened to and whether or not I was the person who stepped up to help the poor thing. Nothing ends well with a mother chaperoning her sons school field trip to a renaissance festival.
Seriously?! on Sunday. He thinks the mermaid’s shell bra is muscles. He cannot see below his chin and I may have told him I made him into the Hulk. This is why he is making the body builder flexing/Hulk face. I really, really am a good mom.
Mitchell, “You know mom we start health this week.” Both boys looking back and forth at each other like I don’t know what they learn in health. Avery, “We need a new binder for notes” Mitchell, “Yeah, the teacher said were taking a LOT of notes.” Avery, “Notes about SEX. Everyday, talking about sex, sex, […]