You can take the boy to the city but he’s still going to find a way to act like Tom Sawyer.
Poor Tired Husbands and their Wives’ Naughty Books, My “Fifty Shades of Grey” Experience
I feel like an outcast.
My sweet, southern, girlfriends that I find so refreshing, have a little secret.
You can drive by their brick houses and see that something is going on with the family that lives there. The pansies that were planted last fall are leggy in their flower beds and should have been pulled out a month ago, and replaced with begonias. Their flower pots are sitting empty. Has there been a separation? Impending divorce? Illness?
No, they just discovered “mommy porn.” They are hiding in a little corner in their homes reading “Fifty Shades of Grey.” I know because when we go to soccer practices or the club their whispering about it, giggling. They greet each other with, “what page are you on?” They declare that the second book is better than the first. Everyone my age is talking about it as if they have never seen the opposite sex’s private parts in the daylight. They are acting like a locker room full of high school boys with a dirty magazine. I feel so left out!
The Bethenny Frankel Show Called Me!!!
I have to share this super exciting thing that happened about a week ago. I share this because I realize this is probably as far as my very exciting story is going to go. As usual, my frontal lobe is defective and I ramble things off that perhaps I shouldn’t, even to television producers! As […]
Our Most Embarrassing School Art, To Date Anyway
For all of you with girls I want to remind you that little boys are different. For little boys, that area is a toy that stays with you. To quote one of my kids when they were three, “When can I get one of these BALLS out so I can see what they look like?” Your daughter is putting shoes on her Barbie’s feet right now and I have an anatomically (in)correct foot-less pasta dude on my fridge.
New Pet (Coming Soon to WP)
Here is one of my early posts you might have missed. I will be back tomorrow with something new. I am busy with a NEW PET! Oh my word! What was I thinking! I had to buy two other containers of LIVING creatures to feed it. SOS!!! “Mom, the baby is eating the dirt […]
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