Dear North Carolina Friends and Family, I am sorry, in advance, for our Halloween display. You may want to keep your small children from coming over to play at Miss Abbie’s house until after the holiday. If you decide to still send them*, you may want to talk to them first about Miss Abbie and […]
Honestly, I should have expected this. I can’t expect to get pictures accidentally sexted to me every week of PTO mom’s breasts to write about. I can’t expect to have rotten eggs spontaneous combust all over me and have to have dead baby chickens hosed off whilst stripped naked in the front yard, every week. […]
By talking to myself I am ensuring my external hard drive keeps the memories that my mind sometimes cannot remember. When I looked back at my photographs I knew I needed to tell the story. My blog was born.
“Honey, I HAD you to do the dishes. You should be thanking the dishes. It is because of the dishes you exist.”
Every year I think my mother was smarter than the year before.
Here is a story about my mom called “Back Back Before You Could Just Go And Buy Boobies” that includes the obvious mention of boobs and chicken poop and how you can use one to get the other.
For all of you with girls I want to remind you that little boys are different. For little boys, that area is a toy that stays with you. To quote one of my kids when they were three, “When can I get one of these BALLS out so I can see what they look like?” Your daughter is putting shoes on her Barbie’s feet right now and I have an anatomically (in)correct foot-less pasta dude on my fridge.